Dealing With Doubt

Wednesday, June 26 continued in the same fashion. Breakfast, work in the library, lunch, work in the library, dinner, and back to the guest house. I cataloged roughly 130 books.

I had a big epiphany that day. I was reading Psalm 56 and verses 3 and 4 caught my attention. Here was my thought process.

“(Verses 3&4) When I am afraid I put my trust in you, in God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me? (End verses) I’ve definitely been clinging to that. I don’t fear physical harm; I doubt myself. And that doubting God, in a sense.  After all, He made me the way I am. Doubting myself is like questioning that He knows what He’s doing. And He does. He always does.”

I’m not going to lie. Like most people, I have to deal with insecurities. And I struggle with how to defeat them. It hit me while in Liberia. I am exactly who God intended me to be. That is an eye-opening thought. Because if I believe that God is sovereign and all-powerful, which I do, then I have to believe He didn’t make a mistake with me.

I don’t know about you, but I find that extremely comforting.

2 thoughts on “Dealing With Doubt

  1. Hey Katie Grace. You know what? Even at age 63 I still deal with insecurities. But don’t let that discourage you. God does use us for His purpose with all of our weakness, doubts, talents, and gifts. We may not see the fruits of our efforts in this life, but we are storing up treasures for the eternal life with Him. Sometimes I think that the insecurities that we have may actually be a gift in disguise that keeps us humble and not so full of ourselves.

    Your mission trip friend,

    Steve

  2. Katie, psalm 139 is my favorite verse, and the one I go to when I feel down about myself. God knows our every thought before we speak. He knit us together – beautifully and wonderfully! And He planned all our days before one of them came to be! He is with us when we sit and when we rise. He hems us in and lays his hand on us. Katie, God made you beautifully the way he wanted you to be, and He planned for you to be an important part of our team! And look at the way He protected you in Liberia, and the way He purposed you there. I cannot tell you what a blessing it was to have you as an integral part of our team! Katie, I often do not feel like I fit in with others. And I feel more at home when I am on the mission field, because many pretenses are stripped away and I trust God more to be who He made me- with all my weaknesses but with His strength. I am praying psalm 139 for you that God will search your heart and know you, test you and lead you – to be all that He made YOU to be. Love you, Kathy

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